God's Got This

Every once in a while, God likes to remind me that He’s got this.

            My weight has always been a sore spot for me, ever since elementary school. I do not like to talk about it, and I’m incredibly sensitive about it. This past year, though, I have been trying to get some things in order. I paid off my student loans and credit cards. Now I have some physical things to work on. To that end, I began seeing a nutritionist in May. I joined a gym and try to walk outside when I can (while I can, because let’s be honest: when it gets cold outside, I will be under blankets on my couch with books and hot tea).

            So now it’s September. The end of September, and I was getting frustrated. I have had some ups and downs in the journey. I keep reminding myself: small changes. Baby steps. I can do this. Then I have a setback and there’s this little voice in my brain that says, “Why do you even bother?”

            I hate to admit that. I really do. But I suspect many people – maybe most people – have this voice in their head when they’re striving towards goals and experience setbacks. Do you hear that voice, too? Why do you even bother?

            I sent my nutritionist a message about my frustration. I wrote: “This has been a frustrating week. I think I’ve made some really good food choices and I’ve walked and gone to the gym, but it doesn’t really feel like anything is changing. Maybe more is happening than I think, and maybe it’s enough that I’m making small changes and trying to stay active. (My husband) tried to give me a pep talk. It’s easy to say ‘Don’t get discouraged’ but I’m having a hard time convincing myself that what’s good to hear is also truth. Is it enough to celebrate the small things if things aren’t looking the way I’d like them (me) to look?”

            She said this in response: “I feel your frustration, but changing the habits and making that your new lifestyle is half the battle.” This and everything she said after that is true. I didn’t feel much better.

            I sat down that night to do my journaling and devotions. I’ve been reading, Beholding and Becoming: The Art of Everyday Worship by Ruth Chou Simmons. I opened it up that night and this is what she said: “So take heart, dear friend: Practice makes progress, not perfect. The race you’re running day by day, the one foot you place in front of the other, the daily choice to persevere, and the diligence to throw off entangling sin – in these God is at work to perfect your faith through your practicing, again and again, the race marked out for you. And with the love of a knowing Father who’s gone before you, He assures you: “Child, I know what you don’t know. You’re going to be thankful for this one day.”

            God has this amazing (and often annoying!) habit of putting the words in front of me that I need to hear: those reminders that God is with me and that every time I struggle, He’s still cheering me on. Somehow those words quieted my soul in ways no one else had.

I looked up at the ceiling, imagining that I was looking up at Heaven, and I smirked as I said, “Show off.”

Does God do this with you, too? What words/people/circumstances has God put in your path to remind you that He is with you and whatever you’re going through, God’s got you?