Prayers in Church: Just Some Thoughts from a Pastor's Perspective

            Every Sunday, we have a time in the worship service where we lift up prayers of joy and concern. It’s usually after the sermon. In our tradition, we lift up the requests and then I (the pastor) lead the whole congregation in a time of prayer that ends with the Lord’s Prayer (we say “debts and debtors.” I sometimes tell people to pray the Lord’s Prayer in whatever tradition they know and we debtors will wait for the sinners and trespassers to keep up!). It’s a unique space in the service that calls for audience participation. Some Sundays, we have only  a handful of requests. Other Sundays, we have a lot of requests. Sometimes people give very few details or just ask for specific names. Other times, we learn more about someone’s issues in two minutes than that person would probably appreciate us knowing. Because we are also a hybrid church right now, I try to repeat the highlights of the request so people in the back (and on the screen) can hear the request. 

            After church, I type up all the requests lifted up in worship and send them out to our prayer chain. This way, someone who wasn’t in worship still knows what we prayed for that day. It’s a private email thread that someone has to sign up for. 

            And today I’m wondering this: What happens to all those prayer requests? 

            I know some folks hear the requests and make a special effort to reach out to the person we prayed for. If someone lost a loved one, someone might send a sympathy card. We don’t always know what happens when someone hears a prayer request, so I want to lift up to you the idea that we can do something with those prayer requests. My hope today is that you take these words as an invitation to do something with those prayer requests. Maybe you have the list with you during the week and keep it somewhere that you remember to pray for the people on the list. Maybe you are a person who loves to send cards and you can send a card to those on the list. I wonder how someone might feel when they open that card and know they were heard and remembered.

            Now. Here’s what this is not an invitation to do. Hearing prayer requests isn’t an invitation to share those prayer requests with the general public. If you go home and tell your partner or kids or housemates, I think that’s probably okay, within reason. But if you hear a prayer request and put up the prayer request on social media for the world to see, that’s not okay. Gossip does not build up the kingdom. Hearing prayer requests isn’t an opportunity to judge. It’s also not an opportunity to try and one-up each other. Have you ever had that happen to you? You share something on your heart and someone answers, “That’s nothing. Let me tell you about this.” That doesn’t build up the kingdom, either. Our prayers are not invitations for competition, they are offerings to God. 

            I’m a huge fan of asking permission to share prayer requests. If someone tells you something, it’s always a good idea to ask, “Can I ask for prayer over this?” This is especially important if you’re using full names in a worship service that is live streamed on YouTube like we do. When I repeat things at the pulpit, I try not to use full names since we are a live broadcast. And please, it’s okay to be picky about what details you share, especially when it comes to someone else’s personal health.

            And speaking of permission: occasionally, someone will share a prayer request in church that they don’t want to talk about. If you approach someone to ask for more information about their request, check their body language and notice if they seem like this is just not something they can go into in that moment. You might even ask them, “Would it be okay if I ask you about the prayer request you lifted up today?” If you are on the receiving end of that question, please know that it really is okay to say no. If you really just can’t get into it in that moment, know that you are welcome to set the boundary to say no.

            But I do invite you to consider what you can do when you hear a prayer request. Consider also what you would want to have happen when you share a prayer request. And what you don’t want to have happen. And if you have a private request that you still would like someone to pray over, you can always submit a confidential request to your pastor and note that it’s confidential. Prayer is such an integral part of who we are as the body of Christ. We know Jesus prayed for and with His disciples, and we pray with and for one another. 

 

What would you like to have happen when you share a prayer request in worship? Is it enough to know the pastor records it and prays over it with the other requests? Or do you want something more to happen?

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